Spring Break

3/27/09


The girls and I are on spring break now and I am SO happy to have a rest from work. We drove over to Seaside on Wednesday and are staying through Saturday. I was nervous on Wed as I had to have my blood checked first. Luckily it was ok enough for me to go. I did need yet another shot, and they gave me one to go. I am now giving myself my own shots- I NEVER thought that would happen. It gives me the independence to do things like this short trip and it feels good that the shots, which used to freak me out so much, are now not such a big deal.

My fatigue has been pretty intense, but I was determined to take this trip. I’ve just had to do things a bit differently. We took breaks on the drive over, and I’ve just slowed the pace way down. It is our tradition to come to Seaside each spring break, and it is typically a very active vacation, with lots of walking, hiking, playing tag, and running along the beach. Yesterday we drove up to Ft. Clatsop and had our first outdoor picnic of the season. We were wearing our winter coats, but it was great to be outside anyway. And it didn’t rain! I was feeling so good in the fresh air that I took the girls on a short walk through the forest. I cannot even begin to describe how nice it felt to be walking through the forest with my daughters. It really renewed my spirit. I got tired pretty quickly, so we headed on up to Astoria and played in the indoor water park for a few hours. I got to relax in the hot tub and I was able to play tag in the water with the girls. We typically climb up the Astoria column and throw paper airplanes off the top, but I knew that’d be too much for me. So we rode the trolley along the river instead. It was full of families with very young children and elderly people. Just my crowd at the moment. The girls were a little bored, but I was happy to be sitting. I got more and more tired, though, so we headed back to our cottage and spent the evening watching t.v, which is a big treat for the girls so they were happy.

Today they both really want to go to the beach and fly kites. It is cold and drizzly and I am out of energy already and it’s just 1:00. I’ve had a nice bath in the Jacuzzi tub here in the cottage, and Kaycee is making lunch for all of us. She has really stepped up and helped out so much on this trip. I figure I can wrap up in blankets and just watch while the kids play. I’m hoping the cold air will be refreshing!

I am so very, very grateful for the alternative treatments I’ve been getting. My finger pain is gone. My finger tips went a bit numb after the last treatment, but not too bad. I am so grateful for how well I’ve done with all of these treatments. I cannot believe I’ve only got one more to go. In 5 days I will be ALL DONE with chemotherapy! Sure, I’ll still have the recovery period to get through after the last one, but I’ll be done!

3/38/09

Back Home

We made it back home today. It rained and rained and I am SO tired from the long drive. Yesterday we made it to the beach, and we did fly kites, and we got soaked in the rain. And, it was fun anyway. I ended up hitting a wall right in the middle of dinner. I got so tired and my muscles started aching so much. I rested on the couch and the girls finished up dinner and cleared and rinsed the dishes. They have both grown up so much these past few months. It seems to make them feel good about themselves when they are able to help me out. Before we left Seaside today, the girls wanted to go shopping in a little indoor shopping place with a big carousel in the middle of it. I woke up tired today and knew that I didn’t have the energy to take them shopping. I ended up giving them their cell phone and sitting in a little coffee shop sipping tea while they shopped on their own. They LOVED the independence so much. They would go into one shop, then check back in with me, then go on to another shop. They bought each other a present and bought one for me. It was very sweet. I am so proud of my girls and so happy that my having cancer didn’t ruin their lives like I thought it would.

I was exhausted when I got home, and we were all starving. We walked in and my sweet friend D was there with the house all warm, the lights on, and hot pizza waiting for us. And, she filled all my vases with orange roses (the color recommended to me by one of my wise women). F had been working on my garden while I was gone, and D and a neighbor had mowed the lawn. I now have 3 raised beds with a gated fence around them to keep the deer out. Even though it is pouring down rain, I can look out the window and imagine my garden oasis after I get to do some planting. I am so touched by these sweet people in my life. My vacation with the girls was nice and we had a chance to really connect with each other. And I am so happy to be back home!